Wednesday, December 19, 2007
Saturday, December 15, 2007
A letter to myself at 13
I saw this on a friend's blog, and immediately knew I'd have to crank out one of these. For most people, this is an awkward age they'd like to forget. For me, 13 was the begging of the best(-looking) few years of my life.
Dear Shel,
You're turning out well so far. Thank goodness your parents sold that deli so you have slimmed back down this year. Okay, let's start here. You are slim! Yes, I know you are a larger size than all your best friends, but don't let that get inside your head. Think logically. You keep choosing friends who are 3-5 inches shorter than you. Of COURSE you are going to wear a size 3 instead of a 1. Life is good. Trust me. There will be a day when single digits are a distant dream and you will want to beat yourself about the head remembering how you thought you were fat all through your teen years. If you'd like to prevent the foray into Lane Bryant territory, maybe you should try getting addicted to exercise at an early age. That might serve you well in the future.
Now, I know you kept score at the ballfield for two months to earn $300, but there's really no need to spend it all at the mall in one day. This is a really bad habit and one you should squelch now. The Dolfin shorts are fine, but leave the Dolfin shirt on the rack. It is MESH at the top. There's no way your Mom is letting you out of the house in that. You do not need a Culture Club poster or those jelly shoes. They will make blisters and your feet will stink to high heaven in those. And there's no need for you to spend $20 on sexy bikini underwear. You are not even going to kiss a boy for 3 more years, so I'm not sure why you need those anyway.
Speaking of clothing, go home and hang all your Esprit in the closet. Do you know what it does to your mother to watch you stomp all over it in your room? Your parents are comfortable, but probably not made of money, so I know they're working hard to buy you all these name brand clothes. I know this hard to believe, but there are people out there without Esprit and Chic jeans and Ralph Lauren. You should really take better care of your things.
Now we need to talk about the future a little bit. There are some things that just aren't going to happen for you and I'd like to go ahead and let you know so maybe you won't get your heart set on them.
First, you are not getting a brand new red corvette with a bow on it for your 16th birthday. In fact, you're not getting a car until about 3 months later and then it will be Mercury Lynx 4 speed. You know, that doesn't HAVE to be your first car. Just becuase that is the first car you go to see doesn't dictate you have to say that's the one you want. Be patient and find an automatic. It will make it much easier to sneak out of the house if you are actually capable of driving the car.
The guy you date in your 20s and he says that one day you will get married? You won't. When you break up the first time, just let that be it. No need to spend 4 years on that nonsense. Geez. Don't waste all that time getting him out of the debt he made before he knew you. He's not going to buy you that ring from the Service Merchandise catalog anyway.
You're not going to give birth to girls. Stop thinking about their names. There won't be any. You'll have two beautiful boys. When you find out the first one is a boy, you'll be in shock, but decide it's fine. The second time, you'll cry for a minute before deciding you can have bunk beds for them. They are the most precious little guys in the world. Tell yourself you want to be a boy mom, because ultimately you will. And they will melt your heart every day. They'll tell you they love you without prompting. They'll be smart and gorgeous. And of course, they'll be very well-dressed.
Oh, don't worry about whether or not your sister is EVER going to have a baby. She will. And it will be a boy too, so don't go pinning any great pink hopes on her. I can't tell you anything else about your nephew because he has yet to make his debut. I know it's hard to imagine now because your sister is the great annoyance of your life, but one day you'll love her and will even do things with her by choice. You'll be looking forward to this sweet boy because he'll be like another one of your own. Your sister and her husband (you'll be meeting him in a very few years - and if you want to start keeping an eye on him, he'll be in middle school this year, too) love your boys so much and the feeling is more than mutual. You can't wait to have that special aunt relationship with their baby, too.
Must run now. It's close to Christmas and there is lots to be done. Even if you don't take any of my advice, you'll turn out fine. I am really stressing that you should watch what you eat and exercise, but I know you won't listen to me now, so get ready to spend a lot of time at the gym in your 30s!
xoxo, Just-turned-37-year old you
Dear Shel,
You're turning out well so far. Thank goodness your parents sold that deli so you have slimmed back down this year. Okay, let's start here. You are slim! Yes, I know you are a larger size than all your best friends, but don't let that get inside your head. Think logically. You keep choosing friends who are 3-5 inches shorter than you. Of COURSE you are going to wear a size 3 instead of a 1. Life is good. Trust me. There will be a day when single digits are a distant dream and you will want to beat yourself about the head remembering how you thought you were fat all through your teen years. If you'd like to prevent the foray into Lane Bryant territory, maybe you should try getting addicted to exercise at an early age. That might serve you well in the future.
Now, I know you kept score at the ballfield for two months to earn $300, but there's really no need to spend it all at the mall in one day. This is a really bad habit and one you should squelch now. The Dolfin shorts are fine, but leave the Dolfin shirt on the rack. It is MESH at the top. There's no way your Mom is letting you out of the house in that. You do not need a Culture Club poster or those jelly shoes. They will make blisters and your feet will stink to high heaven in those. And there's no need for you to spend $20 on sexy bikini underwear. You are not even going to kiss a boy for 3 more years, so I'm not sure why you need those anyway.
Speaking of clothing, go home and hang all your Esprit in the closet. Do you know what it does to your mother to watch you stomp all over it in your room? Your parents are comfortable, but probably not made of money, so I know they're working hard to buy you all these name brand clothes. I know this hard to believe, but there are people out there without Esprit and Chic jeans and Ralph Lauren. You should really take better care of your things.
Now we need to talk about the future a little bit. There are some things that just aren't going to happen for you and I'd like to go ahead and let you know so maybe you won't get your heart set on them.
First, you are not getting a brand new red corvette with a bow on it for your 16th birthday. In fact, you're not getting a car until about 3 months later and then it will be Mercury Lynx 4 speed. You know, that doesn't HAVE to be your first car. Just becuase that is the first car you go to see doesn't dictate you have to say that's the one you want. Be patient and find an automatic. It will make it much easier to sneak out of the house if you are actually capable of driving the car.
The guy you date in your 20s and he says that one day you will get married? You won't. When you break up the first time, just let that be it. No need to spend 4 years on that nonsense. Geez. Don't waste all that time getting him out of the debt he made before he knew you. He's not going to buy you that ring from the Service Merchandise catalog anyway.
You're not going to give birth to girls. Stop thinking about their names. There won't be any. You'll have two beautiful boys. When you find out the first one is a boy, you'll be in shock, but decide it's fine. The second time, you'll cry for a minute before deciding you can have bunk beds for them. They are the most precious little guys in the world. Tell yourself you want to be a boy mom, because ultimately you will. And they will melt your heart every day. They'll tell you they love you without prompting. They'll be smart and gorgeous. And of course, they'll be very well-dressed.
Oh, don't worry about whether or not your sister is EVER going to have a baby. She will. And it will be a boy too, so don't go pinning any great pink hopes on her. I can't tell you anything else about your nephew because he has yet to make his debut. I know it's hard to imagine now because your sister is the great annoyance of your life, but one day you'll love her and will even do things with her by choice. You'll be looking forward to this sweet boy because he'll be like another one of your own. Your sister and her husband (you'll be meeting him in a very few years - and if you want to start keeping an eye on him, he'll be in middle school this year, too) love your boys so much and the feeling is more than mutual. You can't wait to have that special aunt relationship with their baby, too.
Must run now. It's close to Christmas and there is lots to be done. Even if you don't take any of my advice, you'll turn out fine. I am really stressing that you should watch what you eat and exercise, but I know you won't listen to me now, so get ready to spend a lot of time at the gym in your 30s!
xoxo, Just-turned-37-year old you
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