A letter to myself at 13

I saw this on a friend's blog, and immediately knew I'd have to crank out one of these. For most people, this is an awkward age they'd like to forget. For me, 13 was the begging of the best(-looking) few years of my life.

Dear Shel,

You're turning out well so far. Thank goodness your parents sold that deli so you have slimmed back down this year. Okay, let's start here. You are slim! Yes, I know you are a larger size than all your best friends, but don't let that get inside your head. Think logically. You keep choosing friends who are 3-5 inches shorter than you. Of COURSE you are going to wear a size 3 instead of a 1. Life is good. Trust me. There will be a day when single digits are a distant dream and you will want to beat yourself about the head remembering how you thought you were fat all through your teen years. If you'd like to prevent the foray into Lane Bryant territory, maybe you should try getting addicted to exercise at an early age. That might serve you well in the future.

Now, I know you kept score at the ballfield for two months to earn $300, but there's really no need to spend it all at the mall in one day. This is a really bad habit and one you should squelch now. The Dolfin shorts are fine, but leave the Dolfin shirt on the rack. It is MESH at the top. There's no way your Mom is letting you out of the house in that. You do not need a Culture Club poster or those jelly shoes. They will make blisters and your feet will stink to high heaven in those. And there's no need for you to spend $20 on sexy bikini underwear. You are not even going to kiss a boy for 3 more years, so I'm not sure why you need those anyway.

Speaking of clothing, go home and hang all your Esprit in the closet. Do you know what it does to your mother to watch you stomp all over it in your room? Your parents are comfortable, but probably not made of money, so I know they're working hard to buy you all these name brand clothes. I know this hard to believe, but there are people out there without Esprit and Chic jeans and Ralph Lauren. You should really take better care of your things.

Now we need to talk about the future a little bit. There are some things that just aren't going to happen for you and I'd like to go ahead and let you know so maybe you won't get your heart set on them.

First, you are not getting a brand new red corvette with a bow on it for your 16th birthday. In fact, you're not getting a car until about 3 months later and then it will be Mercury Lynx 4 speed. You know, that doesn't HAVE to be your first car. Just becuase that is the first car you go to see doesn't dictate you have to say that's the one you want. Be patient and find an automatic. It will make it much easier to sneak out of the house if you are actually capable of driving the car.

The guy you date in your 20s and he says that one day you will get married? You won't. When you break up the first time, just let that be it. No need to spend 4 years on that nonsense. Geez. Don't waste all that time getting him out of the debt he made before he knew you. He's not going to buy you that ring from the Service Merchandise catalog anyway.

You're not going to give birth to girls. Stop thinking about their names. There won't be any. You'll have two beautiful boys. When you find out the first one is a boy, you'll be in shock, but decide it's fine. The second time, you'll cry for a minute before deciding you can have bunk beds for them. They are the most precious little guys in the world. Tell yourself you want to be a boy mom, because ultimately you will. And they will melt your heart every day. They'll tell you they love you without prompting. They'll be smart and gorgeous. And of course, they'll be very well-dressed.

Oh, don't worry about whether or not your sister is EVER going to have a baby. She will. And it will be a boy too, so don't go pinning any great pink hopes on her. I can't tell you anything else about your nephew because he has yet to make his debut. I know it's hard to imagine now because your sister is the great annoyance of your life, but one day you'll love her and will even do things with her by choice. You'll be looking forward to this sweet boy because he'll be like another one of your own. Your sister and her husband (you'll be meeting him in a very few years - and if you want to start keeping an eye on him, he'll be in middle school this year, too) love your boys so much and the feeling is more than mutual. You can't wait to have that special aunt relationship with their baby, too.

Must run now. It's close to Christmas and there is lots to be done. Even if you don't take any of my advice, you'll turn out fine. I am really stressing that you should watch what you eat and exercise, but I know you won't listen to me now, so get ready to spend a lot of time at the gym in your 30s!

xoxo, Just-turned-37-year old you

Thanksgiving Feast

Just a little quickie to share some pix from school. Yesterday, Turner's class had their Thanksgiving Deal. They made Friendship Stew. I made peanut butter sandwiches. My friend Andrew brought pumpkin pie and a few not-as-trusted moms were responsible for bringing in chips. It was a gorgey day, so they were able to eat outside. Oh, and in case you are wondering, Mrs. Y is smart enough to know that everyone wanted to be a Native American, so there were no pilgrims at the feast this year.

Turner's table:


Turner and a few pals:


Turner and his BFF:

Uh oh, I've been tagged

I have not been writing faithfully, nor have I been reading faithfully. I have a very good reason. No time. Seriously. :) Allison tagged me on this, so before I try to think of a topic, I'll just ease back into blogging with this fill in the blank session.

Four Films I Could Watch Over and Over:
1. The Breakfast Club. Brings back warm and fuzzy high school memories. Not because the movie imitated my high school life (but if it did, I'd totally be Claire), but because a good friend and I used to quote it back and forth to each other daily. I miss Jason Page.
2. Gone with the Wind. It reminds me of growing up, watching it with my Mom and aunt. I loved what a drama ho Scarlett was. And she is the most gorgeous lady I've ever seen.
3. Pretty in Pink. This one reminds me of high school, except I wasn't from the wrong side of the tracks and my prom dress came from Classy Lady, Too.

4. I really want to say Four Weddings and a Funeral, but don't want Allison to think I'm a copycat. But Andie MacDowell has the most perfect accent in the world. Oh, let's switch to Sex, Lies & Videotape. I get Andie and a bonus James Spader.

Four Favorite TV Shows:
Um, I think I could use four favorite TV shows on each channel, or each genre, or each season. Something. I don't think I can limit myself.
1. The Office. I do not laugh out loud while watching TV often, but every Thursday I do.
2. Prison Break. Maybe it's because I practically know Wentworth Miller?
3. America's Next Top Model. I feel like it's making me an expert in something.
4. The Biggest Loser. This is SO much more inspiring and enjoyable when you are actually losing weight while watching it.

Four Favorite Foods
1. Snow Peas and tofu with brown rice. I'm drooling on the keyboard.
2. Bean tostadas. This has been my favorite for 25 years or so. I ranked my stir fry ahead of it because the DH had lunch at Stir Fry Cafe without me today.
3. Apples and peanut butter. Yum. This would have never been on my list before I began Training for Life.
4. Pinto beans (or white beans or navy beans), but only when my mom makes them especially for me.

Four Websites I visit Every Day:
1. Jie
I haven't been uber-regular anywhere else lately, but I do visit a few places very frequently:
2. All of my friends' blogs.
3. Turner's school website.
4. I've been cruising the Body Pump boards.

Four Places I Would Love to Be:
1. At the gym
2. At the Loews Vanderbilt hotel in Nashville
3. The condo we stayed in over the 4th of July
4. The Great Smoky Mountains in a kickin' cabin

Four Favorite Colors:
1. Orange - Powell orange
2. Olive green
3. Red
4. Navy blue

Four Names I Love But Wouldn't/Couldn't Use for a Kid
1. Will. totally doesn't work with my last name.
2. Walker. I have a slight amount of regret that I didn't use it for Loudy.
3. Scarlett. No girls, and not a SOUL in my family approved of it anyway. You'd think they were Yankees.
4. Holland. This one was well-accepted, but I still didn't have a beautiful girl on which to bestow this name.

Four People to Tag:
Anyone who happens to be here who hasn't done this?

Seriously?

You know I love patchwork. And plaid. And J. Crew's junior line - crewcuts. But sometimes the designers carry it all just a little too far. Check out this blazer. For a mere $350, you can dress your 2-10 year old in this piece of loveliness.

7 things about me

Following my amigas...

1. I am often the smartest person in the room. Seriously. And even when I'm not, it gives me a lot more confidence to tell myself that I am. I recently went to a birthday party and there were LOTS of people packed into the office of that trailer park, but I never doubted my position as Smartest Person there.

2. I am all about Tommy Hilfiger jeans. This is a recent development, due to my weight loss. It gives me a sick thrill to wear these heinous jeans because I know how long it has been since I was able to button them. Today my jeans have an American Flag ribbon all the way around the waist band. Tommy is so patriotic.

3. I have no idea where my engagement ring is. I wore it one Saturday in the spring, came home, took it off, and I have no idea where it is. The problem is that I was too fat to wear it regularly, so I'd just pull it out when I really wanted people to know I was married. It was probably a couple of weeks before I looked for it again and it was MIA. This is starting to worry me a bit. How will I ever be able to trade up if I don't find it?

4. I love the color orange. And I really think it has nothing to do with the Vols. Throughout the year, I long for fall so I can wear my multitude of orange sweaters and my orange shoes. I would never wear either past the Thanksgiving though. Orange must give way to red on the day after Thanksgiving.

5. I'm really concerned about this TV writers' strike. This could totally affect my life. Thank goodness there are enough reality shows to get me through the tough times that are sure to come without new episodes of my favorite dramas and my favorite comedy - The Office.

6. Apparently I'm going to turn into one of *those* moms. I'm really mad at Turner's art teacher for giving him an S instead of an E. He tries really hard and loves that class. That S hurt his feelings. This happened several weeks ago and I'm still mad about it.

7. I'd like to visit all 50 states, and I'd like to take my children. But as long as we continue to go to Florida twice a year and Kiawah once, that's probably not going to happen. I think I'm going to take them to Baltimore in January, so that's a start.

Update from Wednesday and Turner's journal

A small update from the Wednesday from hell. I went to the PTO meeting well-prepared. I took paper, notebooks, a Junie B. Jones book, several engines, plenty of snacks, crayons and pencils. Loudon decided he would much prefer to play with the paint stirrers the kids use to mark the spot where they get their library books. Get two of those and you can play the drums on the table, smack them together or beat your brother with them. Apparently it is also a lot of fun to take off running across the library screaming. I was pretty sure I heard a couple of "SHHHHHs" but tried to pretend I was being paranoid.

Eventually, some b*tchy woman lets out an "Oh my gosh!" in response to his antics and I see there is no understanding that children sometimes behave this way (or in my case, always do) and you have to bring them with you when PTO meetings are held at 3 freaking PM. Unable to take any more humiliation, I have to pack up the thousands of things I brought to entertain my boys and keep them quiet while Loudon continues to go berserk. I shove everything into my backpacks and go to grab Loudon. He screams louder than ever while I grab him up and toss him over my shoulder. I put him down once we're outside the library and he takes off running. I catch up to him just as he opened the other door to the library and started back in with an evil grin on his face. I did catch him before the door closed behind him and had to carry him kicking and screaming to the car. Yeah. We skipped karate.

Now that I have that off my chest, on to sweeter things. I have met many friends on my "board" in the last few years. Some I have talked to on the phone, some just online and some I have actually met a few times. Turner now counts a Jie kid as one of his closet pals as well. An excerpt from his journal at school yesterday:

I like to play Pokemon cards with Maison in Florda.

Mason is actually spelled without the "i" and is a boy, not a house in France. If you read my blog, you definitely know Mason and his Mama. :)

Wednesday again

Some people live for the weekend. Not me. I strive to make it to Wednesday night. I have come to despise Wednesdays. They are exhausting from way before sun-up to far past sundown. My day goes like this:



4:45 a.m. Wake up and take a quick shower

5:30 a.m. Get to the gym and kill myself for an hour

6:38 a.m. Arrive home where I am immediately greeted by my husband: "Get these boys something to wear." I trudge upstairs to the whines of a 6-year old terrified he will miss the bus. He is worried that I haven't signed his agenda or written the check for his field trip. His pants are too big, his shirt is too long and his shoes are too slow. Tough.

7 a.m. 6-year old leaves and it's 3-year old's turn. "I don't wanna go pee pee in the potty yet. I snuggle with Mommy." Ahhh, one of the sweet spots in this horrible day.

7:30 a.m. My 3-year old goes to Mimi's house and I am blissfully alone to take a shower and make it to work by 8:30.

8:30 a.m. - 1 p.m. I do 8 hours worth of work and internet surfing.

1 p.m. My Mom and Loudon will come and bring my favorite meal from Panera. Okay, this is a definite highlight.

2:15 p.m. Head out to school with Loudy to pick up Turner and take them BOTH to the PTO meeting that should start by 3 p.m.

3:45 p.m. Sitting in the PTO meeting tapping my foot and calculating how many seconds it will take to reach karate, which starts at...

4 p.m. Karate. Oh, how I hate it. I have now been reprimanded because Loudon does not sit quietly in a chair and watch. I am on egg shells that we will be tossed out on our tails the next time he crawls across the floor playing race cars.

5 p.m. Arrive home from karate. Just enough time to shove some food down my children's throats and search wildly for Turner's AWANA handbook and vest (which will most likely need to be ironed from being crumpled in a corner somewhere).

6 p.m. Run out of the house and to the local church where he attends AWANA. Drop him off and head to the gym.

8 p.m. Pick up Turner and drive home, imagining changing into comfy clothes and climbing onto the couch for 5 minutes of TV viewing before I drift off to sleep.

8:05 p.m. Tell my husband he's in charge of baths and bedtime and go hide under a comforter. Approximately 7 seconds later I will be found. It's not fair that anyone has to take a bath ever. Daddy's being mean. Turner points out that he's not even dirty and he took a bath last night.

The torture continues until at least 9 p.m. Honestly? I'm not even sure how long it lasts because eventually my mind tunes them out and I pass out cold.

25 lbs.

This one is all about me. I have lost 25 lbs. in 10 weeks. That's significant. It ties my record for Most Weight Lost. It means I've stuck with something for 10 whole weeks. Dutifully, I have gotten up every M/W/F morning at 4:45 (sometimes 5, once 5:20) to be at the gym for a 5:30 a.m. training session. I gave up Coke Classic, my only real vice. I go to the gym most evenings. I live, live, LIVE for Friday night Body Pump. I can do push-ups for crying out loud. Yet, I have many more pounds to go. And I have let El Rey start creeping back into my diet. I still wonder when I am going to quit. Because I am a quitter.

I quit everything. I try to surround myself with people to do things with me so I won't quit, but that doesn't always work. I got my (now) BIL to take Music Appreciation with me in college and then I dropped it because it was too annoying to come back to campus after lunch. I convinced my sister and BIL to become Lutheran and go to MY church. Now they're ushers and committee members and I haven't darkened the doors in a year. I was all hopped up on going to the gym for a few months after Loudon was born and begged my BIL to go to a class with me for a few weeks. When I went back this fall, HE introduced ME to HIS friends in the class. I could go on and on with examples, but you get the point.

I'm a quitter. And I can't quit this. I have too much to lose (pretty good pun, huh?). So, I'll keep getting up at 4:45'ish and I'll keep paying my trainer to be my best friend. And this time next year when I'm sporting something close to my early '90s physique, congratulate me. Not on losing the weight, but on being a reformed quitter.

Hello again

I am going to renew my commitment to blogging so that you, the five or so people who know about my blog, can keep up with all the titillating details that are my life.

Less than 2 hours until my son dons his first pair of tights at age 6. Stay tuned!

We are going trick-or-treating with T's current BFF Miss P. We ran into her at Target a few minutes ago, less than 30 minutes after the kids got out of school, and you would have thought they hadn't seen each other in years. I let P's mom go get hair spray - 1 can for her, 1 for the metrosexual DH - and I took the kids to the exercise clothing section, conveniently located right next to the sexy lingerie section. Miss P is yelling "BRAS! Ewwwww! GROOOSSSSSSS!" while T fondles every piece of underwear in the department, thus causing P to go into a hysterical fit. Hopefully by the time he hits puberty he will adopt her line of thinking.

Thomas, here we come!

Well, I really want to be sure my little L gets to see Thomas Live next month. As a result, I've been obsessed with getting tickets since a month ago. I had to buy an engine at TRU to get a special presale code. The presale date kept MOVING and MOVING and eventually I stopped stalking the site for 48 hours and of course, they went on sale. A couple of days ago I randomly got 3 tickets on Row B for the 4 p.m. show. Today the real ticket sale began. I had to split us up to get decent seats, but I have 2 in the orchestra pit (YES!) and 2 in row D. I'm so stoked. I can't wait to see my sweet boy's face when the show begins.

One summer we took T all over creation to do the Day Out with Thomas ride. He never appreciated it. I was giddy as we drove 5 hours to AL to see Thomas and Sir Topham Hat. He was unimpressed with Thomas and scared of STH. L is a different kid. I KNOW he won't disappoint me. Right? Stay tuned until next month to find out!

Where to get money

We've all had those weeks, months or years when we could have used extra cash. T knows that we go to work to earn money. Thanks to a mommy who ships boxes of clothing to a friend to ebay for me, he also knows that you can sell your clothes for money. I don't know what channel he has been watching, but he informed us over the weekend that you can also call Countrywide. Who knew?

Arrrggghhhh!

So, it was the last day of Pirate week at camp. I think day camp is one of the best things to happen to T. I love that he's making new friends while spending time with one his oldest pals. He and Add go way back to their days in the 2s class. Two days ago he growled at Kristine, and then me, when recalling the kids in their group singing "T and Add sitting in a tree.." that day at camp. Last night, I heard him gleefully singing it himself, all the way to the baby part. See? He's getting a lot out of camp.

At the same time, I've really enjoyed getting to spend some one on one time with L this week. He has a couple of weeks off before his camp starts and he's getting his first taste of being an only child of sorts. I don't think he likes it all that much. The excitement on his face when Turner comes home melts my heart every day.

I have no idea how to blog...

...but I have a feeling this is going to be a momentous summer, so I should certainly document it.

The first big thing - I no longer have a baby. L has become a little boy. He has given up his "sassabar" and talks about Spiderman as much as Little Einsteins (thanks to a certain big brother). He's leaving the toddler class for new adventures in PS1. He's old enough to go to VBS. Yes, the baby stage is over for me. And I'm mostly glad. I love having KIDS!

T just finished kindergarten. I can't believe that a year ago I questioned whether or not he was ready to go or where I should send him. He had a wonderful year and matured so much. He made friends and so did I.

He's so much like me as a little kid, but I am happy to see that he is more outgoing than I was (or am). He is doing a summer track program with 5-18 year olds. He marches right up to the other kids, no matter the age, and just starts talking. I was a little worried when he was taunting a 16 year old during the warm-up laps, but fortunately the kid was a good sport. :D